We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Randomize
