Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.