How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal