then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
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