I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize