You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Randomize
