I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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