we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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