ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
tequila makes me forget i have legs
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
