I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
