doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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