Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I think my moral compass just broke
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