he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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