so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize