did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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