careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize