Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
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I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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