***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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