Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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