we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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