I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
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The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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