imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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