So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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