Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
