Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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