Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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