you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Randomize
