I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
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