dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
