what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
