She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
My penis needs a shock collar
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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