I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
