We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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