I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize