Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
