i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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