Responsibility does not care about your dick.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I want to fling myself into the sun
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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