walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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