My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
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