omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
