Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
So much Jack, so little girl.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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