So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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