can u get pink eye on your cock?
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
