The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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