He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
