so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Randomize
