dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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