Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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