the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
