I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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