We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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