Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
