I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
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